Musings from Mommy Duck…
When I began writing almost three years ago I had no idea where this journey would take us. All I knew is that we were going to trust the Lord, be positive, and be authentic. All of those things were equally important and still are, but authenticity is one of those things I feel like is lacking on social media sometimes. I loved sharing all the amazing things God did all along our journey, but you know what? There are hard days too, and I believe it’s just as important (if not more so) to talk about those days. Because while we love to hear about what’s going right with people, we really relate to the things that go wrong, don’t we? I know I love seeing other moms with mountains of laundry and dirty dishes at their house – it feels like we’re all in this together!
So on that note, here’s a question for you. Have you ever had a time where you prayed for something specific, the Lord answered it, and then you really wished you could change your mind and say, “I take it back!,” or is that just me?
I’ll explain…
My specific prayer this week was that the Lord word grow me. That seems like a good prayer, right? Decently safe. Not like praying for patience where I will get “opportunities” to PRACTICE patience (thank you, no😬). I really meant that I wanted to study and learn more, but as I was studying, the “opportunity to grow” came in the form of a very pointed and unexpected question.
This is one of those questions that is going to make you think. WARNING: You know how once you see something you can’t unsee it? Well, after you read something you can’t unread it either. So continue reading at your own risk and don’t say I didn’t warn you!
This was the question I read yesterday morning…
“Are you prepared to let the Spirit of God search you until you know what the level and nature of sin is in your life – to see the very things that struggle against God’s Spirit in you?” (Oswald Chambers – “My Utmost For His Highest” – April 10
This is where I would really like to say – “never-mind Lord, growing doesn’t sound quite so fun anymore!” Analyzing my heart and discerning where my human nature is at odds with the Holy Spirit does not sound like a particularly pleasant exercise. It sounds up close, personal, and deep.
Frankly, things in my life are good right now. My walk with the Lord and life in general are in a good place. It would be so easy to coast along and enjoy the ride. Why should I rock the boat and ask the Spirit to search me?
Answer…
…because that is how we grow.
We must choose to be intentional about following the Lord, letting go of our own will, and trusting the Spirit to keep us on track. It seems that “safe” prayer I prayed isn’t quite as safe as I thought it was. In fact, it seems that it was a bold prayer in disguise.
Now that the question has been asked and is out there, it requires an answer. Am I ready or am I not? Am I willing or am I not? The beautiful thing about our Lord is that He allows us to choose. Personally, you are going to find me being obedient to the Lord. I may take a little time to examine what is being asked of me so I understand, but I have seen God do such amazing things that no matter what, I ultimately want to be with Him where ever He is.
And that, my friends, is real life with this Mommy Duck.
Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜
Psalm 19:14
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer
Psalm 51:10
Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.
